February 23, 2010


PIERRE DU PORT ARRIVES IN THE LAND DOWN UNDER AND IS GREETED BY "AUSSIES" FLOWER AND CODY


Cloon: Joining me via skype is Pierre du Port. Bonjour Pierre!

Pierre: How are you going?

Cloon: You mean how's it going or how am I doing?

Pierre: No worries. It's "Aussie" lingo.

Cloon: How was that epic flight?

Pierre: Bloody long way Mate! And lots of turbulence in cargo.

Cloon: My Human put you in cargo?

Pierre: No worries Mate, I had a bit of jet lag though...

Cloon: Have you found poutine there yet?

Pierre: No, no poutine to be found. I'm eating fairy bread instead.

Cloon: What's fairy bread?

Pierre: It's white bread with butter and colored sprinkles on it. It's quite popular here.

Cloon: Sounds like something I need to get started in Canada...Bring back the recipe, will ya?

Pierre: Sure Mate.

Cloon: How's it going with the Aussie canines Flower (first photo) and Cody (second photo)? Did they try to give you a chew? You are a dog toy after all...

Pierre: They've been very polite. We all went on a horse carriage wine-tasting trip in the Hunter Valley. It was excellent, most excellent.

Cloon: Did you get any Aussie animals to sign contracts for the Australia Zoo in Canada yet?

Pierre: Not yet, but we soon are going to see some kangaroos in the wild. So it's looking hopeful.

Cloon: Excellent, excellent. Well keep us posted will ya?

Pierre: Will do Cloon, will do.

Cloon: Over and out...

February 14, 2010

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY & 1 YEAR BLOG ANNIVERSARY!!!

Well hello there Audience, welcome to our 1st Year Anniversary of the Clooney's Num-Num Fund Blog. It's been a year packed full of action and informative stories. Continue to join us as my Human and "Pierre du Port" update us on their travels through the Land of Oz recruiting for my Australian Zoo in Canada and presenting my paper: Num-Nums: The Secret Laboratory Findings at the Symposium in Australia. I couldn't go with them as I'z a bit of a nervous traveller and let's face it folks, Australia is a bloody long ways away. Wishing you all a Happy Valentine's Day. I gots my Human an Edward T-shirt (we'z both fans), chocolates, a special coffee mug and a rose for Valentine's and she gots me num-nums. It all worked out.

A friendly reminder: Felines remember to give a gift to your Human today and Humans remember to give your felines num-nums.

February 11, 2010

MISS STORMY WEATHERS ORGANIZES BURLESQUE FUNDRAISER
FOR THE "PINK NOSE SOCIETY"

Cloon: A warm welcome to Miss Stormy, our in-studio guest today. Now, Miss Stormy I understand you've organized a fundraising event for the "Pink Nose Society".

Miss Stormy: Yes, that is correct. I've produced, directed, choreographed and promoted the upcoming event "Burlesque de Chat".

Cloon: That sounds like quite an undertaking. What made you decide to add to your already busy schedule with the nannying and all?

Miss Stormy: TIM, I'm doing it all for TIM...

Cloon: We've gone down that road before...Trust me he's not interested.

Miss Stormy: A girl can always hope, can't she? Besides, one of these days I'll swipe him into submission.

Cloon: Tell us more.

Miss Stormy: Well on a daily basis I give the guy a swipe across his pink nose...

Cloon: You're a wild one Miss Stormy. Now back to the fundraiser, what else can you tell us?

Miss Stormy: Make sure to come out and see some Feline Burlesque and support the "Pink Nose Society" of course. The $100 ticket for the evening includes your infamous catnip brownies, am I correct?

Cloon: Yes, I better get baking...we're expecting a sold-out performance and I'z only gots the easy-bake oven. A thanks to Miss Stormy and lines are now open for ticket sales.

Dial 1-800-PNK-CATS now...

February 2, 2010

GROUNDHOG DAY WITH "STAN THE WORLD'S SMALLEST SHEEP"

STAN SAGRADO, "WORLD'S SMALLEST SHEEP", REPORTS THE RESULTS OF GROUNDHOG DAY

Cloon: Hello there my friend. It's been a long while since we've spoken. How are ya little fella?

Stan: Muy bien, gracias!

Cloon: So I understand that you were in attendance at some Groundhog Day festivities. Can you share with the Audience what happened?

Stan: Claro que si. I attended the pancake breakfast this morning and awaited the weather prediction of "Balzac Billy" a local groundhog.

Cloon: The suspense is killing me! What did theese one have to say?

Stan: Well, "Balzac Billy", also known as the Prairie Prognosticator, emerged from his burrow and did not see his shadow. The crowd was overjoyed with this news as this means there will be an early spring.

Cloon: Excellent, excellent. How would you rate the pancakes?

Stan: No se. I only eat leaves.

Cloon: Right... washed down with a little cerveza...huh, little buddy.

Stan: Eso es correcto.

Cloon: Now, what about "Punxsutawney Phil" the famous American groundhog from Pennsylvania? What did he predict today?

Stan: Well, he did see his shadow this morning, thus forecasting 6 more weeks of winter.

Cloon: I guess it sucks to live out East doesn't it? I read on the interwebs that they feed "Punxsutawney Phil" dog food, so maybe the little guy's a bit confused...

Stan: Es posible.

Cloon: Did you ever see the movie "Groundhog Day", little buddy? Theese one is really funny...

Cloon: Did you ever see the movie "Groundhog Day", little buddy? Theese one is really funny...

Stan: (Puzzled look on his face...)

Cloon: Just messing with you man! Thank you for joining us today with all the insider information.

For a small donation to the Num-Num Fund, Stan is available, this evening, as a "practice buddy" for beginners Spanish. There are limited spots, so act quickly to avoid disappointment...

February 1, 2010

MR. L ("FILM CRITIC IN TRAINING") REVIEWS AVATAR


MR. L ("FILM CRITIC IN TRAINING") REVIEWS AVATAR


Cloon: Hello there Mr. L. Now before we get down to business with our most important movie review, tell us how your dream date with lady Pamela went?

Mr. L: Well first of all, I don't "lick and tell". But perhaps for one of those BBQ T-bones, I could divulge just a few details...

Cloon: That can be arranged. I tell you what, I'll throw you a bone and you throw us one back, will ya?

Mr. L: I like teamwork! I must say that my date was fantastic! My lady Pam is very lovely and she said that I was a very interesting conversationalist, I can thank "The Baby" for that. We checked out various hotspots like the Hollywood Walk of Fame, Rodeo Drive and Venice Beach. It was a lot of fun and I left with her autograph for "The Baby"...and a "deal" for a mockumentary film series I'm currently working on...

Cloon: Excellent, excellent. Now, let's discuss Avatar, shall we? I see you have some special glasses on and some blue hair, can you tell us more about theese ones?

Mr. L: Well, I have become an honorary member of the Na'vi tribe so I'm trying out some blue hair, in the form of a wig, to see if it suits me before I go ahead with a hair plug transplant.

Cloon: Is "The Baby" hooking you up for that?

Mr. L: Well yes indeed, he does know some people in Cabo...

Cloon: Are those x-ray lenses or can you communicate through them like a secret agent?

Mr. L: Unfortunately not, but they have special 3D powers and let me tell you...they're excellent!

Cloon: So what kind of rating on the "Tomatometer" do you give theese "Avatar"? Do you agree with the 82% rating?

Mr. L: No, I do not. I give Avatar a 99.9% rating. It was a spectacular piece of cinema. A masterpiece really!

Cloon: So why did you withhold the 0.1%?

Mr. L: Uh, there were no squirrels in the movie.

Cloon: I guess Pandora doesn't have squirrels. I wonder if it has Num-Nums? The film did have some pretty cool looking birds and insects though.

Mr. L: Affirmative.

Cloon: And Jake Sully is our hero, we're in the process of forming a "Jake Sully Fan Club".

Mr. L: That is correct, so far it's me, you, your Human, TIM and "The Baby" that are members.

Cloon: I've also been working on my avatar in my secret research laboratory.

Mr. L: Are you trying to replicate the Na'vi?

Cloon: No, it's a 10 feet tall gray cat that looks identical to me. Now that I see your wig, I may add some blue hair though, it does look cool. Is there anything you'd like to add about the film in closing, Mr. L?

Mr. L: Yes, I urge all canines, humans and felines to go see this revolutionary film "Avatar". It is excellent, most excellent.

Cloon: Take it from the film critic (in training) folks...

ANYONE WANTING TO JOIN THE "JAKE SULLY FAN CLUB" IS ASKED TO CONTACT CLOON AT HEADQUARTERS.